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ID #586
Occurred: 9 Jan 2015
Submitted: 11 Jun 2015, 9:04 PM
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Rating: 3.600/4 (5 votes)
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(19:20:52) GoldenJimbo007: $1873 for engagement ring
(19:21:11) DrInvertigone: You bought Rachel an engagement ring?
(19:21:21) isthatagoodlinux: they're engaged to be married
(19:21:24) isthatagoodlinux: did you literally not know
(19:21:40) DrInvertigone: When was this
(19:21:44) isthatagoodlinux: two weeks ago
(19:22:09) DrInvertigone: I hate wedding talk. :-(
(19:23:34) DrInvertigone: I'm very sad right now.
(19:26:39) DrInvertigone: Hopefully I can put a ring around someone's finger when I get this St. Paul job and become a famous baseball broadcaster.
(19:32:40) DrInvertigone: I want the attention and my moment in the limelight. A wedding could give me that.
(19:33:01) isthatagoodlinux: erm, what
(19:33:09) Infil1212: a great reason to get married
(19:33:16) isthatagoodlinux: right now i am about as confused as i have ever EVER been EVER
(19:33:23) Infil1212: typically the wedding day is the bride's moment, for the record
(19:33:26) DrInvertigone: Well, that's one of the things I'd want to get married for.
(19:33:27) TopRogue7: the wedding day is the bride's moment in the limelight
(19:33:36) DrInvertigone: I'll make sure the spotlight is on me. No worries.
(19:33:42) isthatagoodlinux: wait
(19:33:47) isthatagoodlinux: what
(19:33:52) isthatagoodlinux: did he really just say that

(19:34:07) ngonhislaptop: wedding is a really, really expensive and inefficient way to get attention
(19:34:49) DrInvertigone: But I also know the glitz and the glamor of it. I'm sick of sitting in seats watching others get married. I can't wait until it's my time.
(19:35:13) Infil1212: so you want to get married because you get to throw a huge party and people celebrate you, NOT because you want a wife
(19:35:33) Infil1212: you can throw a huge party at any time though?
(19:35:40) DrInvertigone: I don't really do that.
(19:38:16) DrInvertigone: I ain't drinking if I ever have a wedding. That's for sure.
(19:38:31) DrInvertigone: I also have no plans to hold a bachelor party if I get married.
(19:38:45) GoldenJimbo007: Who the hell doesn't want a bachelor party
(19:38:57) DrInvertigone: Me, Jim.
(19:39:37) DrInvertigone: Speak for yourself. I tend to live in seclusion. So, the night before my wedding I would just relax at my place doing whatever, maybe watching baseball or playing my N64 or something. Better yet, maybe I'll be calling baseball on the radio.
(19:39:53) Infil1212: the night before your wedding you might be throwing up with nervousness
(19:40:05) isthatagoodlinux: imagine if you had a panic attack 5 minutes before your wedding
(19:40:13) isthatagoodlinux: because you were thinking about having a panic attack at your wedding
(19:40:19) Infil1212: lol

(19:40:37) Infil1212: what's wrong with a bachelor party, alec
(19:40:43) Infil1212: isn't this exactly the attention you want?
(19:40:52) Infil1212: a party someone else plans for you where all the focus is on you
(19:41:11) DrInvertigone: I'm not a party person. I plan on deejaying my own reception, too. No requests allowed.
(19:41:57) Infil1212: i've never heard of the groom DJing a party, usually they're busy doing wedding stuff?
(19:42:03) Infil1212: like cutting the cake and dancing with their new wife?
(19:42:07) DrInvertigone: Well I plan to make an exception here.
(19:42:18) DrInvertigone: I'll be deejaying and asking my wife to come up and dance during select songs I play.
(19:43:45) venisonvixen: Why wouldn't you give a DJ your playlist so you can spend time with the wife and guests?
(19:43:57) DrInvertigone: I like to do things myself.
ID #585
Occurred: 10 Dec 2014
Submitted: 11 Jun 2015, 8:56 PM
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Rating: 2.800/4 (5 votes)
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GoldenJimbo007 (12:55:29 AM): I caught a mouse on stream
GoldenJimbo007 (12:55:40 AM): Brought the little son of a bitch to my table (still alive for a good 40 mins btw)
GoldenJimbo007 (12:55:46 AM): Waited for him to die, no dice
GoldenJimbo007 (12:55:49 AM): So he peed on my table, then I got mad
GoldenJimbo007 (12:55:53 AM): So I took him outside and ended the misery there, stomped on the trap
GoldenJimbo007 (12:55:57 PM): Popped its eye out but wasn't dead
GoldenJimbo007 (12:55:59 PM): I had my sandals on (with socks, sigh)
Thiradell (12:56:28 AM): your table has the power of death but he was alive for 40 minutes?
GoldenJimbo007 (12:56:31 AM): Plastic mouse trap, caught him by the nose
GoldenJimbo007 (12:56:45 AM): So he was kicking and squeeling as I put him on camera
GoldenJimbo007 (12:56:54 AM): I set the trap/mouse next to my microphone and played around with this
GoldenJimbo007 (12:56:58 AM): 40 minutes later he's still trying to get out
Thiradell (12:57:28 AM): twitch suing
Infilament (12:57:51 AM): jimbo gets mad because an animal in his death throes urinated while jimbo was putting him on camera for his own amusement
DKK5 (12:58:01 AM): ^
Infilament (12:58:03 AM): so jimbo taught that son of a bitch a good lesson
DKK5 (12:58:32 AM): Torturing animals in public is a slippery slope
DKK5 (12:58:40 AM): Just ask known troll thingy
GoldenJimbo007 (12:58:56 AM): It's not torture when he previously ate through some of my food and poo'd all over my pots and pans
StinsonOnIphone (12:59:09 AM): Lol
StinsonOnIphone (12:59:13 AM): So it's justified?
DKK5 (12:59:26 AM): That's what the folks at Guantanamo Bay said
ID #584
Occurred: 9 Dec 2014
Submitted: 11 Jun 2015, 8:33 PM
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Rating: 4.000/4 (5 votes)
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(22:17:42) ngonhislaptop: alright Jim consider me IN at the $120 price point for this Patriots @ Packers game if you can lock in a no-Ritch weekend
(22:18:05) ngonhislaptop: anything higher price than that will need to be reconfirmed, and any Ritch voids the contract
(22:18:48) Thiradell: Ng tells it like it is
(22:21:39) pylemire: ngsuperleg sure knows what he wants!
(22:26:29) DKK5: who controls speed run jon?
(22:26:59) Infilament: ngamer, will you ever spend a full day with ritch
(22:27:05) Infilament: under any circumstances, ever, in your lifetime
(22:28:27) ngonhislaptop: hmmm I guess for a million dollars I would, if it happened 70 years from now and I was deaf and blind
(22:28:44) GoldenJimbo007: Guess I won't waste the money on an Ngamer wedding invite
(22:30:13) Infilament: what about if you, jimbo, wiff, me, youse, DK, third, and 12 other eliters all went to a football game at lambeau together
(22:30:17) Infilament: BUT ritch also came along
(22:30:34) Infilament: would that be a dealbreaker for you
(22:30:42) Infilament: we would make sure she sat on the opposite end of the row from you
(22:31:03) ngonhislaptop: hmm... I'd go if she took her own car and sat on the other side of the stadium and didn't hang with us before or after
(22:31:13) DKK5: lol
(22:32:11) Infilament: no, she would come in one of the same vehicles we take
(22:33:47) ngonhislaptop: hmmm I'd be willing to drive her if she rode in the trunk and I was already in the stadium before Jim opened it
(22:33:55) Thiradell: lol
ID #583
Occurred: 7 Nov 2014
Submitted: 11 Jun 2015, 8:26 PM
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Rating: 3.600/4 (5 votes)
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(19:37:07) GoldenJimbo007: Had another little interesting driving story on the way to work today I'm sure chatters will find entertaining
(19:49:04) GoldenJimbo007: So every morning when I go to work for 7:00 AM, I encounter a ton of buses, and it gets super irritating
(19:49:12) GoldenJimbo007: They stop all the time, they drive super slow, etc
(19:49:25) GoldenJimbo007: So this morning I got stopped behind a bus TWICE, nearly putting me late for work
(19:49:39) GoldenJimbo007: I thought I had it cleared when it turned right, but nope, one up the road was another bus coming right at me with a group of kids waiting about a block ahead
(19:49:50) GoldenJimbo007: I race to beat the bus past its "red light, stop sign" point, but to no avail, I'm way short
(19:50:07) GoldenJimbo007: I eventually said f this, and gunned it past the bus
(19:50:20) GoldenJimbo007: Bus driver lays on the horn, I flip him off (first instinct), and race off to work
(19:50:30) GoldenJimbo007: Guess I'll keep my eyes open for a ticket
(19:52:58) ngonhislaptop: you do realize when you try to bird a bus driver you're ACTUALLY birding 25 eight year olds right?

(20:20:33) isthatagoodt: lol you're getting a ticket
(20:20:35) isthatagoodt: have fun being fucked
(20:20:49) isthatagoodt: bus drivers have basically a 100% rate at getting you, i'd know
(20:20:50) GoldenJimbo007: I'll dispute it
(20:21:31) isthatagoodt: nah there's no disputing it either
(20:22:07) isthatagoodt: i hear about these all the time
(20:23:03) isthatagoodt: my dad is the transportation director for a school so he deals with it several times per year
(20:23:46) isthatagoodt: iowa recently upped the penalties for this too, fine up to $675 and possible jail time for passing a bus with the stop sign out
(20:24:11) isthatagoodt: after a 7 year old girl 1 town over got demolished by a dude in a pickup going 50mph
(20:24:30) COME as u r337: but did the dude flip the driver the bird as he went flying by?
(20:26:36) GoldenJimbo007: If it's some outrageous ticket I'll prob just ignore it conveniently
(20:26:56) ngonhislaptop: another flawless Jimbo strat, cool cool

(20:31:01) isthatagoodt: you said you were behind the bus
(20:31:27) GoldenJimbo007: no no I was pissed because I was behind 2 buses already
(20:31:36) GoldenJimbo007: When that bus turned right, I was in the clear
(20:31:42) GoldenJimbo007: Except for one in the distance (coming toward me)
(20:31:50) isthatagoodt: oh, then what were you speeding for you idiot
(20:32:12) isthatagoodt: you could have killed a kid for no reason
(20:32:23) COME as u r337: jim i can hear the swat team choppers above your trailer now
(20:34:35) GoldenJimbo007: Yeah it's always to awful with buses when I work at 7
(20:34:51) COME as u r337: leave 3 minutes earlier?
(20:35:09) GoldenJimbo007: Would have to be like 7 mins earlier or so
GoldenJimbo007 has left the room

(22:07:25) Infilament: jim driving story is insane
(22:07:51) Infilament: who guns it past a stopped bus driver because they're upset, then flips the bus driver off lol
(22:08:48) Infilament: the entitlement is insane to me
(22:09:07) ngonhislaptop: he had no choice, it was either risk the lives of children the world over, or wake up 5 minutes earlier
ID #582
Occurred: 28 Oct 2014
Submitted: 11 Jun 2015, 8:01 PM
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Rating: 3.000/4 (5 votes)
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TopRogue7 (7:43:45 PM): seems like you kicked your depression right off
TopRogue7 (7:43:50 PM): to what do you attribute your success
DrInvertigone (7:44:11 PM): Well I did go on a date Saturday night and a date with someone else Sunday morning and both are open to seeing me again.
Thiradell (7:45:03 PM): lol
Thiradell (7:45:09 PM): sounds like a predicament
DrInvertigone (7:45:22 PM): The kind I'd like to have, for a change.
DrInvertigone (7:45:49 PM): Well I have one I'm more interested in than the other.
TopRogue7 (7:46:24 PM): whys that
DrInvertigone (7:46:38 PM): Connection, personality. Bonding.
DrInvertigone (7:50:34 PM): Well I told them both I'd like to see them again and both suggested Saturday night.
Thiradell (7:51:26 PM): what do you plan to do, Al
DrInvertigone (7:52:31 PM): See what they're both doing. Nothing is set in stone yet. I felt stronger about the second one. I've kissed both of them. The first one on the cheek. The second on the hand. I've also paired up with them arm in arm, so to speak.
Thiradell (7:54:56 PM): say they're both avail Saturday night
Thiradell (7:55:36 PM): what then
DrInvertigone (7:55:50 PM): Try to see if I can take the other one out Sunday.
Thiradell (7:56:04 PM): lol
Thiradell (7:56:29 PM): didn't know you were a polygamist
DrInvertigone (7:56:58 PM): I'm not. But I'm also trying to see who may be the better fit and if I can be able to finally do the unthinkable.
ngameratwork (7:57:42 PM): what are we not allowed to Think about in this context?
Thiradell (7:57:55 PM): the revival of Lord Voldemort
(8:17:46 PM) DrInvertigone has left the room.

(21:35:44) BluelineGoddess: unthinkable is sex obv
(21:35:54) BluelineGoddess: penis in cooter
(21:36:15) TopRogue7: "I've also paired up with them arm in arm, so to speak."
(21:36:25) TopRogue7: so to speak, i wonder what he REALLY means
(21:37:09) Thiradell: "I've also paired up with them arm in arm, so to speak" could be sold on the market for thousands of dollars
(21:37:16) Thiradell: golden line
(21:37:22) BluelineGoddess: he's painfully awkward Rob Lowe
(21:37:25) TopRogue7: I've also paired up with them penis in cooter, so to speak.
(21:37:29) Thiradell: lol
ID #581
Occurred: 12 Jul 2014
Submitted: 21 Oct 2014, 11:04 PM
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Rating: 3.000/4 (6 votes)
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GoldenJimbo007 (3:28:54 PM): Talked to a Christina in Green Bay who knew you quite well Ng
GoldenJimbo007 (3:28:59 PM): We discussed you for a good 10 minutes!
Im Ngamer (3:31:59 PM): yeah Christina's cool we worked together quite a bit when she was still in Appleton
GoldenJimbo007 (3:32:43 PM): She's got a nice little corner office here
CarathornPD (3:33:05 PM): who is Christina
CarathornPD (3:33:14 PM): I have no idea what ppl are talking about in this chat
CarathornPD (3:33:17 PM): ive been away for too long
isthatagoodlinux (3:33:20 PM): christina was ngamer's work wife
CarathornPD (3:33:28 PM): what is a work wife?
GoldenJimbo007 (3:33:36 PM): He has a girl he's in love with but only at work
Im Ngamer (3:33:37 PM): Work Wife is a situation like Jim and Pam on The Office
CarathornPD (3:33:45 PM): the closest ngamer will ever get to a work wife is work wifi
ID #580
Occurred: 16 Sep 2014
Submitted: 14 Oct 2014, 10:42 PM
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Rating: 2.667/4 (6 votes)
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GoldenJimbo007 (9:33:02 PM): Alright looks like everyone wants an update
GoldenJimbo007 (9:33:10 PM): I got hammered drunk last night, 2nd worst of my life
GoldenJimbo007 (9:33:18 PM): Rachel drives to town wanting Applebees, wants me to join her
GoldenJimbo007 (9:33:28 PM): I try to text her saying I can't drive, she doesn't believe me
GoldenJimbo007 (9:33:39 PM): She drives to party, I stumble to her car, she actually punches me in the nose
COME as u r337 (9:34:24 PM): why did you get hammered?
GoldenJimbo007 (9:34:40 PM): Was only 1.5 miles from home, "last night of summer" bonfire etc, free booze
GoldenJimbo007 (9:34:52 PM): Everyone else taking shots and it was the wedding party from June
GoldenJimbo007 (9:35:19 PM): But man she clobbered me in the face, hurts to blow my nose now heh
Im Ngamer (9:35:22 PM): WHOA now that's domestic abuse and you don't have to stand for it #whyjimleft
DKK5 (9:35:28 PM): I'd report that domestic abuse
COME as u r337 (9:36:14 PM): ray-chel rice
GoldenJimbo007 (9:41:09 PM): She feels p bad about it now so maybe don't bring it up in chat
COME as u r337 (9:41:31 PM): props to jim for not retaliating until he researches the domestic abuse policies at WG&R to make sure he can still get paid
ID #579
Occurred: 18 Aug 2014
Submitted: 14 Oct 2014, 9:36 PM
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Rating: 3.333/4 (6 votes)
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GoldenJimbo007 (6:26:32 PM): Re: depression topic
GoldenJimbo007 (6:26:40 PM): Pretty sure money would cure all depression I ever faced
Infilament (6:27:00 PM): jim, don't say meaningless stuff like that
Infilament (6:27:18 PM): there's no precedent in human history for that statement
DrInvertigone (6:27:24 PM): No, Ricky. He's right. Pretty sure a girlfriend would cure all depresion *I* ever faced.
Infilament (6:27:40 PM): sigh
Thiradell (7:00:06 PM): if you have a relationship that lasts at all, and that relationship ends, you will feel worse than you ever have before
Infilament (7:01:12 PM): have you experienced heartbreak to this extent?
DrInvertigone (7:02:07 PM): Yes. Constant rejection by women. By even men, to a lesser extent. Getting passed over when I applied for jobs. Other heartbreak: 2003 NLCS, Super Bowl 41, 2010 NFC Championship, 2013 Week 17, 2014 Western Conference Final Game 7.

Infilament (7:43:39 PM): alec do you think there is no deeper level of heartbreak possible than you've experienced?
DrInvertigone (7:43:56 PM): Oh, there is, but I might as well face it since I've faced a lot already.
Thiradell (7:44:01 PM): yikes
isthatagoodyouse (7:44:07 PM): that makes absolutely no sense
Thiradell (7:44:15 PM): might as well chop my arm off since I got a papercut
isthatagoodyouse (7:44:19 PM): lol

GoldenJimbo007 (8:31:52 PM): Corey I was almost offended when you listed sports near-misses as depression
DrInvertigone (8:33:04 PM): Your favorite team won in 2010. I wasn't alive in eighty-five!
Infilament (8:33:18 PM): says the guy who LITERALLY just lived through two championships for his favorite team
dragondragon18 (8:33:25 PM): but you were alive for the blackhawks stanley cup champs
DrInvertigone (8:33:27 PM): *Second favorite team.
Infilament (8:33:37 PM): okay, sorry, second favorite team
Infilament (8:33:39 PM): i'm really sorry for you
GoldenJimbo007 (8:35:22 PM): Corey, I'll take you to a Brewers vs Athletics world series game this year
GoldenJimbo007 (8:35:26 PM): Will you not be depressed then?
DrInvertigone (8:35:54 PM): It'll be off my bucket list. It'll give me temporary happiness, but eventually, maybe weeks or days later, I'll sink back into my sewer.
Infilament (8:36:11 PM): now replace "attend a world series game" with "be in a relationship"
Infilament (8:36:18 PM): and your statement EXACTLY applies the same way
GoldenJimbo007 (8:36:10 PM): A fat bitchy republican girlfriend will do the same to you
GoldenJimbo007 (8:36:21 PM): Eventually you will slap her for burning your macaroni and cheese
GoldenJimbo007 (8:36:25 PM): And you'll fight/argue and she'll break up with you
DrInvertigone (8:36:40 PM): Depends how Republican we are talking here.
Infilament (8:37:06 PM): lol
Infilament (8:37:18 PM): alec would never date a staunch right-wing girl?
DrInvertigone (8:37:37 PM): You could be conservative. Just don't be crazy.
Infilament (8:37:54 PM): aha! i found out alec's bottom line
Infilament (8:38:01 PM): any girl, as long as you're not a crazy conservative
GoldenJimbo007 (8:38:09 PM): Or Rachel
GoldenJimbo007 (8:38:55 PM): "So now he'd date me?" ~ Ritch (she was sitting behind Jim reading Chat)
DrInvertigone (8:39:21 PM): Well I wouldn't date her if I had already been in a relationship, but I'd date her to be my first to get it out of the way.
dragondragon18 (8:39:31 PM): wow
GoldenJimbo007 (8:39:42 PM): Rachel just went into fight mode lol
GoldenJimbo007 (8:39:45 PM): Holy shit I'm dying here
dragondragon18 (8:39:46 PM): lol
ID #578
Occurred: 13 Oct 2014
Submitted: 14 Oct 2014, 9:26 PM
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Rating: 3.000/4 (6 votes)
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*Jim texts to say he got into a car accident that morning*

Im Ngamer (3:31:24 PM): WHY were you even on the road to have your car run into Jim, I thought you had off today
GoldenJimbo007 (3:31:38 PM): It was in my work parking lot, had some stuff to do there!
GoldenJimbo007 (3:31:50 PM): Was sitting in my car talking to my buddy next to me in his car when it happened lol
Im Ngamer (3:32:30 PM): someone who drives a huge truck professionally 40 hours a week didn't notice your gigantic boat of an automobile?
GoldenJimbo007 (3:32:36 PM): Correct
GoldenJimbo007 (3:32:49 PM): Big dent in back, didn't bust my taillights at least
Im Ngamer (3:32:56 PM): just going ahead and assuming neither of you have had car insurance for 7 years
Infilament (3:33:27 PM): how much did the guy pay you off
GoldenJimbo007 (3:33:48 PM): $30 :-X
GoldenJimbo007 (3:34:42 PM): "What should we do? Call the cops? I pay you?"
GoldenJimbo007 (3:34:46 PM): "Hmmm, paying me is good"
Infilament (3:38:47 PM): lol $30
Infilament (3:38:49 PM): looooool
Infilament (3:38:58 PM): what do you expect to do with that
GoldenJimbo007 (3:39:07 PM): Buy my sweet sweet dinner
Infilament (3:39:09 PM): are you going to repair your car?
GoldenJimbo007 (3:39:17 PM): Nah, it's just cosmetic
Im Ngamer (3:40:09 PM): how much will you charge me when I accidentally bump Ritch off the Leo Frigo bridge on her daily jog next week?
GoldenJimbo007 (3:40:39 PM): $100
Im Ngamer (3:41:55 PM): hmmmm, that's fair considering the three month's pay I'd save you for that ring
(3:42:47 PM) GoldenJimbo007 has left the room.
Im Ngamer (3:43:07 PM): UH OH sure hope she wasn't prowling around behind him
ID #577
Occurred: 7 Oct 2014
Submitted: 14 Oct 2014, 9:24 PM
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Rating: 2.667/4 (6 votes)
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*Alec enters all excited after a baseball playoff game went 18 innings*

(12:08:43 AM) DrInvertigone has entered the room.
DrInvertigone (12:09:05 AM): Clayton Kershaw is honey and the Cardinals are bees. Zack Greinke is garlic and the Cardinals are vampires.
DrInvertigone (12:12:47 AM): I swear on my life Detroit's hitting is there, the starting pitching is there. But my oh my if the Tigers sat down and played Werewolf in the clubhouse the whole bullpen would be lynched on Day One.
isthatagoodt (12:10:09 AM): how did you handle 2 games at once going on for 6 innings
DrInvertigone (12:10:17 AM): I didn't.
DrInvertigone (12:10:23 AM): I don't have the splitscreen luxury.
DrInvertigone (12:10:30 AM): I watched all 18 innings of the Giants/Nats game.
DKK5 (12:48:02 AM): How is Alec still awake
DrInvertigone (12:49:00 AM): This thing, called Baseball. I just, can handle it. I am ready. Crazy Little Thing Called Baseball. And that, Mr. Kovaz, is why I'm still up.
Infilament (1:02:18 AM): what do you mean, "don't have the splitscreen luxury"
Infilament (1:02:21 AM): watch one of the games on your computer
Infilament (1:03:53 AM): we gotta teach you how to multitask, Al
DrInvertigone (1:04:15 AM): I'm breathing and typing at the same time. That's multitasking right there.
Infilament (1:04:45 AM): well, let's level you up to post-toddler multitasking next time
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